Imagine a mother teetering on the edge, her life unraveling like a frayed rope, and you’ll begin to grasp the raw intensity of If I Had Legs I’d Kick You, Mary Bronstein’s daring new film. But here’s where it gets controversial: this isn’t your typical feel-good family drama. It’s a tense, darkly comedic dive into the psyche of a woman—played by the brilliant Rose Byrne—who’s spiraling out of control. And this is the part most people miss: it’s not just about her daughter’s mysterious illness, her absentee husband, or even her own therapist abandoning her. It’s about the invisible weight of guilt, anxiety, and the relentless pressure to ‘do it all.’
Bronstein’s sophomore feature, which premiered at Sundance, has been making waves in the awards circuit. With a star-studded cast including Conan O’Brien, Danielle Macdonald, Christian Slater, A$AP Rocky, and Delaney Quinn, the film is as much a character study as it is a cultural mirror. Here’s the bold part: Bronstein doesn’t shy away from the messy, unglamorous truths of motherhood and mental health. She calls the story ‘emotionally accurate,’ drawing from her own experiences as a mother navigating family illness. But she’s quick to clarify: it’s not autobiographical—it’s something deeper, something universal.
What sets If I Had Legs I’d Kick You apart is its unflinching portrayal of a mother’s inner turmoil. Bronstein spent seven years perfecting the script, driven by what she calls ‘tunnel vision.’ ‘I really felt like I needed to make this movie,’ she says. The result? A film that doesn’t just show anxiety—it feels like anxiety. And that’s the genius of it. But here’s the question: Does it go too far, or does it finally give voice to the silent struggles so many face?
Since its debut, the film has racked up accolades, including Gotham Awards nominations for Bronstein’s script and direction. Byrne, meanwhile, has been on a winning streak, taking home the Leading Performer award at Berlin and earning Best Actress nods at the Golden Globes, Critics Choice, and more. Yet, for all its critical acclaim, the film’s true power lies in its ability to spark conversation. Is it too raw? Too real? Or is it exactly what we need to see?
Bronstein’s previous work, Yeast (2028), starring Greta Gerwig, hinted at her talent for blending humor with heartache. But If I Had Legs I’d Kick You feels like a breakthrough—a film that doesn’t just entertain but challenges. It’s a reminder that sometimes, the most important stories are the ones that make us uncomfortable. So, here’s your chance: read the screenplay below and decide for yourself. Is this the film that finally gets it right, or does it cross a line? Let’s hear your thoughts in the comments.
